A post traumatic stress disorder community.

Why Me? — October 24, 2016

Why Me?

I'm 21 years old and as of right now my life is on hold. When i was 15 i was raped. I hadn't been sexually active before that and i had no interest, i was always the outgoing one wanting to make everyone laugh rather than have a boyfriend and have sex. A girl a few years older than me wanted to be MY friend, i couldn't believe it, up until then i was the one who always initiated friendships and i always tagged along with people rather than them actually wanting to spend time with me if that…

Why Me?

Are We Supposed To Fight Our Hypervigilance? —

Are We Supposed To Fight Our Hypervigilance?

I just worked out and was walking back from the track when my own thoughts triggered me. I felt unsafe and continuously scanned the environment for threats until I was back in my room. I live in a city, so it's not totally senseless to be vigilant, but scanning the shadows under cars in a parking lot, thinking about how any skater passing me could stab people as he passed them for fun, and checking over my shoulder as I speed-walked away when a drunk guy said "it feels like I've seen you…

Are We Supposed To Fight Our Hypervigilance?

Family Stressors And Traumatic Childhood Experiences Linked To Adhd Diagnoses In Children —
What To Do —

What To Do

I love my wife and she know I have PTSD
We had our ups and downs
What husband and wife have not dealing
With mental illness
So she want to split because we had grown apart that hurt me so much
When she was talking to an ex bf
They both told me that they would not hock up and they did 4 times and we got back together and I feel like shit and get tread like shit
I love her and I want to see it get better
But because of this my mental health has taken the back seat to her because it's…

What To Do

Nightmares And Defeat —

Nightmares And Defeat

Hi All, I'm new to this site. I joined it hoping to connect with people who know what it's like. Right now my biggest problem is nightmares. The past month they've been more and more active. I had two last night and one just now during a nap.

I can't seem to escape them and it's driving me insane. I'm always stressed, tired, and afraid of everyone I meet. I feel weak and damaged and haunted by the flashbacks that constantly come. I'm also alone.

If The Key To Happiness Is Loving Myself Then I Don’t Know That I’ll Ever Be Happy —

If The Key To Happiness Is Loving Myself Then I Don’t Know That I’ll Ever Be Happy

I nearly killed myself last Saturday. I felt really alone and no one wanted to talk to me except my abusive ex (and at least their manipulation is attention). I struggle to maintain a self-concept. I struggle to break through this giant plexiglass shield that has always surrounded me. I'm always hungry.

I don't really know if anything I do is real. I'm not really aware of myself at any given point. I understand I should be practicing mindfulness but I can't do that without hating myself. It…

If The Key To Happiness Is Loving Myself Then I Don't Know That I'll Ever Be Happy

Pay Yourself A Compliment —

Pay Yourself A Compliment

Self- compassion has been the hot topic in Trauma School for the last few weeks, and I suck at it. So this is me doing extra homework to try and catch up to some of the more proficient students in the class – this is me, paying myself a compliment, and practicing accepting it for what it is, and just sitting with the uncomfortable feelings that it generates. Because it's a compliment, and compliments are (allegedly) a nice thing in life.

And I may come back every so often and add one here…

Pay Yourself A Compliment

Wondering If I Will Make It —

Wondering If I Will Make It

From the onset of fall weather and appearances, I start anniversary time. It's not just about a car accident. I was a wife and a mother of 2 young children and within a year I would find out I had dissociative identity disorder so throw that anniversary into the mix. This time of year is always hard for me. This was the 4th anniversary. The actual date has passed and I did better, but not great with the specific day.

Since then I have been falling apart. Last Friday I ended up in…

Wondering If I Will Make It

Thoughts On Possible Emotophobia (fear Of Strong Negative Emotions) —

Thoughts On Possible Emotophobia (fear Of Strong Negative Emotions)

So today in my latest therapy session my counselor and I think I might have a phobia (like true, crippling panic) about the idea of feeling sad – or really anything below happy. I did some research on my own and it looks like there is a name for it: emotophobia. We had played with this idea several months ago but we didn't exactly delve into it. After a weekend of pure panic and Anxiety over the thought of being sad/Depressed, we did some serious left brain thinking and he made this…

Thoughts On Possible Emotophobia (fear Of Strong Negative Emotions)

In Need Of Advice On My Issue With Authority Figures —

In Need Of Advice On My Issue With Authority Figures

Hi, this is my first time using this website.

Ive been suffering from complex PTSD because of my childhood physical, verbal and emotional Abuse from my parents. I have made a lot of progresses over years and I can function much better now, expect for my relationship with authority figures.

As many of Complex PTSD sufferers must experience, I freeze and can't behave naturally with most of authority figures, especially ones who are important for me to get along with.
Consequently, I can…

In Need Of Advice On My Issue With Authority Figures